I was quiet this afternoon…

My supervisor has once told me “it’s time for you to go outside, to show off and introduce yourself to people.”

I do really love her statement because it means that I will have many more visit duties. Frankly, sometimes I feel bored working in front of computer for 6 hours/day.

That’s why I was so excited when I got to attend a discussion as the representative of my institution this afternoon. By the office car, I and my supervisor arrived early at the hotel where the discussion would take place. The hotel is nice and the room for the discussion is quite comfy.

Minute after minute, many more representatives from various institutions came. I was bit surprised because all representatives came to the discussion are mid-level and top-level professionals in their institutions, of course except me, a newbie in this city as well as in my institution. Anyway, I was still capable of handling my nervousness but not in the discussion forum especially when my supervisor had gone. …:(

The discussion was about ‘democracy in Indonesia’, something which was actually discussed many times during my term at the uni. But, the discussion was completely different from the one at the uni since all the participants are well-experienced on the issue of Indonesian democracy. Some are having democracy-related projects in Indonesia and others are professional analysts in several foreign embassies in Indonesia. Me….??

I could relate to the discussion but didn’t find any appropriate comments or questions to raise. I was really very quiet listening to other participants that presented their projects or gave some comments to other institutions’ projects. So, is it embarrassment, good or bad?! Well, personally I would say that it’s good for me. It was kinda warming up for my brain that didn’t ‘work for democracy’ for quite long time (at least since my graduation). For my institution? Yes, it’s good for it. At least I could meet up directly with Ford representative for Indonesia and started making connection with all attendees 😉



  1. Khoi …. do you remember me? Oh fine you’ll remember me if you remember about Brajan hahaha
    You know what? I’ve been in this position. It felt really embarrassed. I felt like a confused chick and didn’t not know what to do. When an idea or comment suddenly came, all of them drowned because I was afraid and i couldn’t raise ’em up.
    Well, we have to understand it because we are newbies while they are already experts. But trust me, it was a good start!
    NIce to know ur blog! :’)

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